


there must be more than blood (that holds us together)

by jaebe0m, moondaisies



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Small Town, Angst, Coming of Age, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Growing Up, Horror, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mystery, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Slow Burn, Small Towns, Thriller
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:05:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27190126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaebe0m/pseuds/jaebe0m, https://archiveofourown.org/users/moondaisies/pseuds/moondaisies
Summary: There are lights in the sky every once in a while. There is a man that shows up before a tragedy happens. There is a silent hum in the fog next to the exit sign. The roads blur with one another, and finding home is sometimes impossible. The woods is more like a vast sea of darkness, chewing things up to never spit them back out again. Someone has gone missing, and something is definitely not right with those eight boys from school.
Relationships: Bang Chan & Everyone, Bang Chan & Kang Younghyun | Young K, Bang Chan/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Han Jisung | Han & Everyone, Hwang Hyunjin & Everyone, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Kim Seungmin & Everyone, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) & Everyone, Lee Minho | Lee Know & Everyone, Seo Changbin & Everyone, Yang Jeongin | I.N & Everyone
Comments: 7
Kudos: 8





	1. where is my mind?

**Author's Note:**

> chapter warnings:
> 
> \- underage drinking, mentions of alcohol and spiked drinks  
> \- mentions of weed  
> \- descriptions of dead animal  
> \- blood
> 
> please be careful!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chan sits on his seat bothered by the gnawing feeling of knowing that something is terribly wrong. His class is more or less the same, nothing is awry and nothing important is being discussed, yet there is still an itch he can’t quite scratch. 

**THE DAILY NINTH**

**_“Locals from the Ninth District are visited once again by the strange lights.” (Dated: SATURDAY)_ **

Above the misty skies of the Ninth District, the glowing lights appear once more. First witnessed by 2 local policemen during the search for a missing dog on a late Christmas evening. However, last night, the lights made a glowing reappearance above the field of Willow Circle. It stayed for an estimated 10 minutes before disappearing into the night sky. To this day, the people continue to wonder whether this could be a sign from a higher being. Its causes and source continue to be unknown. 

—— 

**EXT. A BONFIRE PARTY - 9:06 PM, SATURDAY**

The night air is cold, and the voices of teenagers singing along to music overpower the slight hum of the wind. The fire at the center burns bright; they live like there is no tomorrow--as if the lights in the sky don’t exist. 

In the Ninth District of a faraway province, an end of the school year celebration is being held at the place the locals like to call “The Grove.” Graduation is coming soon for the high school seniors, and the host of the party, a long-legged troublemaking boy named Bambam, is laughing and screaming at the top of his lungs after spilling a drink on a schoolmate’s shoe.

“God, Bambam has got to be the loudest person in town.” Younghyun, a former student of Silvergrass Academy, sticks a finger in his ear in an attempt to drown out the shrill voices of his younger friends. Younghyun, always relaxed, mature, and confident still doesn’t know why he even agreed to attend an event like this. 

“No way. My neighbor is louder.” Bang Chan shakes his head. Bang Chan, or who some people call Chan (or Chris when he feels like it), is a Korean-Australian go-getter who sometimes mistakes bravery for recklessness. Being best friends with Younghyun has taught him to mellow down his impulses, however, when Bambam sent him a text that afternoon inviting him to the party, it only took Chan a second to respond with excitement, already planning to drag Younghyun along since he knew that he could never really say no to him.

——

The music continues to blare as more young and sweaty teenagers grind and dance on one another. The towering trees sway their leaves in shame. Somewhere in that same party, where the coolers of drinks are, stand two awkward and lanky boys. One is dressed in a light blue polo and jeans and another is dressed in his so-called “party outfit.”

“What time are we leaving?” Seungmin takes another sip from his red cup. Somebody from the party had offered it to him and since he hasn’t passed out or started hallucinating, he thinks it’s safe. He isn’t used to parties like this, but saying no to Jisung can lead to more trouble for him than it is to just suck it up for one night. 

“It’s only nine and you’re thinking of going home already?” Jisung is refilling his red cup from a bowl of (probably spiked) punch. He had finished four cups already, and since he doesn’t feel like throwing up yet, he drinks a little more. “We've never been to a party like this, man! Live a little!” Jisung does a dance, and Seungmin grimaces at his friend. Jisung, a kind-hearted yet foolish boy, has his charms but dancing is not one of them.

“We don’t even know who these people are!” Seungmin retorts. He’s right. Jisung had convinced (more like _begged_ ) a boy in their class named Felix to invite them. 

In their tiny town, there lives another Korean-Australian boy named Felix (who is obviously friends with Chan). The boy never really knew how to turn people down, so when Jisung asked him where he and Chan were going on Saturday night, he reluctantly answered. 

That same Felix is now somewhere in the party, drinking something random that was passed onto him by Jackson, another former student of Silvergrass Academy. He isn’t sure what entered his system, but it’s making him feel a slight buzz. He sees a bright red blinking light at the corner of his eye.

Maybe it's the alcohol.

——

“This fucking drink tastes like shit.” A devilishly handsome boy named Minho takes one sip from his red cup before throwing it on the grass. This party is much too tame for him. He had been waiting for something interesting to happen for hours now, and the only thing worth noting was witnessing somebody punch Bambam in the face. 

“Really? I kinda like it though.” Hyunjin responds with a shrug and takes another sip from his own red cup. He sees a group of students whisper and giggle at the sight of him and Minho standing by the fire, and he sends them a flirtatious wink before they run away back to their friends. 

Minho glances at his overly expensive watch, shoulder slightly aching from the sudden movement. “If nothing happens in another hour, I’m heading straight home.” Minho sees Jisung accidentally trip on a rock and he rolls his eyes. 

This party is lame.

——

“Fuck,” Jisung swears under his breath.

“What now?” Seungmin glares at him. He’s been itching to go home but Jisung’s relentless begging and whining are much more unbearable than the obnoxious teenagers at his school.

“I need to take a leak.” Jisung darts his eyes around the area as if he’s being watched. 

“Awesome! Take a piss at home!” Seungmin flashes Jisung a smile and a thumbs up. His leg is just one step closer from darting out of the Grove. 

“No, man! Fuck you!” Jisung grabs Seungmin’s wrist, stopping him from walking away. Jisung squeezes his legs together. He’s afraid that he’s just two seconds away from soiling his party outfit. “I’ll just pee behind those trees. Come with me.” He points at a dark clump of trees. An area of the Grove where the bonfire’s light can’t reach. 

“Only if we go home after!” Seungmin crosses his arms to which Jisung responds with a hurried nod. 

They make their way through the dimly lit forest without looking back.

——

“Hey, Changbin! You’re here!” Chan excitedly greets his odd, reserved friend named Changbin. They met after spending community service together last summer. Changbin was closed-off and a bit on the stranger side to some, but Chan always made sure to treat him kindly so they stayed friends.

Younghyun raises a suspecting eyebrow at Chan. Younghyun knows who to be friends with and who he should never approach, and Changbin is the latter. 

Changbin sends Chan a tight smile. Younghyun pretends he doesn’t see it. “Hey, uh, I’ve got something to show you.” 

Chan’s eyes widen. He isn't good at guessing but he’s positive that he knows what Changbin is talking about. “Uhm… Younghyun do you mind? I’ll come back in a second!”

“Don’t forget that I’m your ride home.” Younghyun sighs and walks away, leaving Chan and Changbin to discuss whatever it is they need to talk about in secrecy. 

The light fades away as the two boys walk towards the darkness. 

—— 

“Changbin’s here.” Hyunjin nudges a bored and clearly irritated Minho. 

Minho immediately sits up from the log of wood that only gives his bottom discomfort. “Well, now that’s interesting.” He smirks, and Hyunjin laughs childishly. Now, the party is about to get fun. 

Hyunjin points at the grove of trees where Chan and Changbin disappeared into. 

—— 

Felix is still taking tiny sips from the cup that was passed onto him by Jackson. He has gotten used to the taste now, but the effects of the alcohol are still messing him up a little. Not bad for his first time trying an alcoholic beverage, but it’s not something Felix would like to do often.

He frowns a little when he spots his only companion in the party leaving to go for a walk with the guy he knows as Changbin. Chan had promised earlier that he would keep Felix company, but Chan is a popular guy so he’s bound to have other friends who’d want to talk to him as well. 

“Hey, Felix!” Felix swiftly turns to find his sweet clubmate, Jeongin, standing next to him with an identical red cup in one hand.

Perfectly innocent and always doe-eyed and wondering, Jeongin sticks out from the party like a sore thumb. He stands by the growing bonfire with shifty feet and a semi-permanent nervous smile on his face. He could be home, safe, and away from the noise and chaos, but Jeongin is not known as a quitter. 

“Jeongin! What are you doing here?” Felix quickly latches onto Jeongin’s arm as his way of protecting his younger friend from harm’s way and also because he’s happy to finally have company. 

“My friends from choir invited me.” Jeongin takes a look around the party, shaking his head. “They let me hitch a ride with them earlier, but they're pretty much wasted now. I want to go home, but I don’t really remember the way.” 

Felix nods in understanding before finally putting his cup down. He doesn't remember the exact way either since he fell asleep in Younghyun’s car on the way here. “Are your parents looking for you already? We can ask Kang Younghyun if he’s okay with bringing us home. Is that fine with you?” 

He doesn't want to admit it, but Felix wants to go home too. He's never been the partying type, and whatever Jackson gave him is starting to make his head throb. He really would bring Jeongin home himself if he knew the way, but Younghyun is the only one he knows with a car and license who’s still sober. 

Jeongin mumbles something about being dead if his parents were to find out that he stepped foot in a party like this. The younger boy nods urgently at Felix’s offer to hitch a ride with Younghyun, face crumpling with worry as time continues to pass. 

The two boys shuffle over to where Younghyun stands. “Hey, Younghyun? Is it okay if we hitch a ride with you to go home? You can say no, by the way.” Felix, however, crosses his fingers behind his back, hoping that Younghyun says yes. 

The college sophomore laughs loudly, his other friends cooing at how cute Felix and Jeongin look. “Chan already asked me if I could bring the two of you home before we got here. I really was planning to anyway.” Younghyun looks at Jeongin with a smile that Felix can only describe as fatherly. “You can join us too, you’re Chan’s neighbor right?”

Jeongin nods excitedly, although there is still a hint of nervousness in his stance. “Yeah, I am!” 

“Alright, guys.” Younghyun takes a quick look at the watch on his wrist. “What time do you kids need to be home?”

Felix and Jeongin give each other wary glances. “Now.”

“ _Now?_ ” Younghyun asks. Felix immediately feels bad for potentially ruining Younghyun’s night with his friends. The guilt probably shows on both of their faces because Younghyun shakes his head. “No, no, no! It’s okay, I promise! I can just take you kids home now, then come back for Chan later.”

“Really?” Felix looks hopeful. Younghyun nods earnestly, giving him a comforting pat on the head.

“You have to tell Chan you’re leaving now, though. He might lose his mind with worry if he comes back and we’re not here,” Younghyun says. He pulls out his car keys from his back pocket.

Felix calls Chan on his phone and when the latter doesn’t pick up, he tries again. On Felix’s fourth try, Younghyun suggests waiting a little.

“He never looks at his phone,” Younghyun explains. He sends Chan a couple of texts of his own.

Jeongin grows increasingly antsy as time passes, and Felix can tell that he doesn't want to wait any longer. “Hey, we’ll get you home in no time,” Felix says comfortingly. “Maybe we should look for him.”

Felix’s suggestion seems to make Jeongin light up. When he turns to look at Younghyun for confirmation, he sees that the college sophomore is already absorbed in another conversation with his other friends. Felix glances at the spot he saw Chan and Changbin walking to earlier.

They couldn't have gone far, Felix thinks as he trudges into the woods with Jeongin’s hand in his.

—— 

**EXT. INSIDE THE GROVE - 10:01 PM**

“You can wait here.” Jisung pushes Seungmin against the base of a large tree. “I’m gonna empty the shit out of my bladder, and you're gonna keep watch. I don't want anyone to see me without my party pants on.”

Seungmin glares at his friend before sighing in defeat, and Jisung runs off to do his private business.

The music is still audible from where Seungmin is standing, but the people at the party aren't as visible. He can spot a couple of students if he squints hard enough, but Jisung really brought them somewhere far.

It's beginning to get a little too chilly. Seungmin wraps his arms around himself to keep warm, the flimsy material of his jacket failing to do its purpose. He rolls his eyes once he hears the sixth Drake song of the night. Jisung would probably go apeshit if he were there.

Speaking of Jisung...

Seungmin taps his foot impatiently. Jisung has been pissing for almost ten minutes now, and Seungmin is just dying to go home at this point. To be fair, his best friend _did_ have a lot to drink since he practically accepted anything that was handed to him. 

Still, pissing for ten minutes is impossible. Jisung’s bladder can't hold _that_ much liquid, right? Seungmin is now betting that Jisung is lost somewhere in the woods. 

Reaching for the reliable penlight that he always keeps in his back pocket, Seungmin sighs for the second time that night as he moves forward to look for his tiny friend. He doesn’t remember it being this dark, though. 

——

“This is all I got for today. Some other kids from school bought some off me this afternoon.” Changbin hands Chan a tiny Ziploc bag. He grabs his phone from his pocket and shines it on the mysterious package. As promised, Changbin got him weed.

Chan cannot contain his laughter. He’s never tried it before, but after finding out that Changbin, his newfound friend had some on him, he couldn’t hesitate. He gives Changbin a warm, almost suffocating hug to which Changbin reciprocates with a tap on Chan’s back. “I didn’t think you’d actually save some for me! Thanks, man!”

Changbin nods and tries to hold back his smile. “A promise is a promise. That one’s on me since I think you’re a good friend.” Chan gives him another hug.

“Care to share?” A voice is heard from behind the trees. It is too dark to see where and who it is coming from, but before Chan can flash his light at the source, Minho steps out with a smug look on his face. 

“The more the merrier right?” Hyunjin’s voice is followed by the sound of leaves crunching under his shoes. Changbin mutters a few curses under his breath while Chan hurriedly shoves the Ziploc inside his pocket.

“Aw come on guys! We won’t tell!” Minho inches closer to them, and Changbin and Chan simultaneously step away. Changbin’s back collides with a tree trunk and he hides the sharp pain by glaring at the two freakishly tall and intimidating boys.

“I can get you some next week. I only gave him enough for one person,” Changbin reasons out. Minho and Hyunjin both shake their heads. At this very moment, they both seem like the devil split in two as the dim light from Chan’s phone barely covers their shadow-like figures.

“That’s what you said to us last time, Changbin.” Hyunjin stomps his foot on the ground, breaking fallen branches as a result. Is the wind’s humming getting louder or did the music from the party stop? Changbin can barely hear anything but their voices and a distant whirring. 

“Look, he said he’d give you some next week, okay?” Chan, a known pacifist, tries his best to settle the bubbling tension. Maybe he should have listened to Younghyun after all. “This isn’t even going to cover the both of you, right?” Chan waves the infamous contraband to their faces. Changbin quickly nods in agreement.

“I don’t want _that_ , dumbass!” Minho slaps the Ziploc being waved to his face and the bag lands somewhere on the ground with all the leaves and dirt. “I want Changbin to give me what he owes me.” 

Chan is too busy rummaging through the leaves to realize that Changbin had run. If not for Hyunjin accidentally stepping on his hand, he wouldn’t have taken notice that his friend is being chased. 

Chan is a pacifist. This isn’t even his fight anyway. But Changbin had just given him free weed for being a good friend, and Chan wants to prove that he is a good one, terrific even. He runs after them towards the clearing.

A forest can make anything disappear; Dark, deep greens that swallow the space. The music stops and so does time. The distant sounds of crunching leaves and the consistent hum of the wind are the only things to be heard. 

——

**INT. SILVERGRASS ACADEMY - 7:55 AM, MONDAY (WEEK 1)**

Seungmin hurriedly parks his bike at its designated area, huffing as he struggles to catch his breath. He’s never been one of the earliest people at school, contrary to popular belief, but he has never been late in his entire life either.

Weird how his alarm didn’t wake him up this morning, or why his phone wasn’t usually fully charged as it should be. Seungmin has always been responsible, so he just chalks it up to him being less careful about his surroundings since he has a few more weeks of school remaining until the break.

He still has five minutes left to make it to class on time. Seungmin makes sure to keep his head down as he runs to the school’s entrance avoiding his friends when they try to stop him for a quick chat. 

He shoves the doors open, however, there is something jammed under, stopping it from fully opening. Was that a squish he just heard? Seungmin stops in his tracks to inspect it further, eyes squinting to decipher the unidentifiable object. The doors suddenly swing open as soon as he leans in, and the object is dislodged.

A dead bird lays next to Seungmin’s feet. Feathers frayed, bloodied, and its eyes are lifeless. He doesn’t have time for this, yet he looks anyway. He is torn between awe, disgust, and terror.

Seungmin gazes at the deceased animal for what feels like a whole minute, palms perspiring at the gruesome sight. He doesn’t stop staring until Hwang Hyunjin from his physics class asks him to move. 

Seungmin mumbles a small ‘sorry,’ but he doesn’t know if he meant it for Hyunjin or the dead bird.

Fortunately for him, Seungmin isn’t marked tardy for his homeroom class, because his teacher is late as well. He gets settled in his seat before he realizes that his homeroom teacher isn’t the only one absent.

Jisung’s seat is empty, and the dead bird becomes an omen. 

——

**INT. CHAN’S BEDROOM - 8:00 AM**

He is not quite sure what wakes him first; was it the sun shining from his windows, or was it his sister pinching his arm? Chan slowly opens his eyes and realizes that he should get darker curtains next time since the sunlight has completely obstructed his vision. There is also a continuous pounding in his head that hinders him from getting up. Maybe if he could just shut his eyes as tight as he could he’ll fall back asleep again.

“You’re going to be late for school.” His sister’s voice echoes in his head like she isn’t quite there. Chan looks at his bedside clock and notices the glowing red numbers telling him that he is indeed going to be late for school. 

There is a sudden rush of adrenaline that flows throughout his body and his pounding headache has immediately become the least of his problems. He gets dressed and skips breakfast then runs out the door, his shoelaces hanging loosely on his sneakers. 

Sometime between stepping out of his front door and briskly walking towards his school, Chan notices that the sky looks a little dimmer than usual. Maybe it’s about to rain, he thinks, or maybe he isn’t quite awake yet.

Sometimes one can walk out of the door feeling as if something is missing, whether it be homework or the money one’s mother provided for lunch, but there’s an undeniable clawing feeling that makes one wonder if something is amiss. Chan knows it isn’t his homework or his lunch as he holds his backpack closer to him. 

Something isn’t right today. 

——

**INT. SILVERGRASS ACADEMY - 8:15 AM**

While the entire class waits for their teacher to arrive, Seungmin pulls out his planner to take note of today’s stranger than usual events. He is halfway through with jotting down a detailed explanation of his weird morning when he sees that the entire page for Sunday is empty. 

_Friday: I got the highest score on the physics exam today. Our vice principal might be pregnant with our P.E. teacher’s baby. He’s married to someone else (I THINK!). Some kid from class fell asleep in the bathroom. Remember to ask mom if I can go to Jisung’s house tomorrow._

_Saturday: Pass by the store before going to sungie’s house. Dad wants superglue. Mom wants eggplants (make sure they’re ripe!), milk, and sesame oil (the kind we normally use). Bring the book to sungie’s place._

_Sunday:_

Seungmin tries to recall Sunday’s events to no avail. His mind goes blank as if all his memories were magically wiped out. The sides of his head begin to throb from thinking too much, so he gives it a break.

The intercom in their classroom crackles to life.

——

Chan sits on his seat bothered by the gnawing feeling of knowing that something is terribly wrong. His class is more or less the same, nothing is awry and nothing important is being discussed, yet there is still an itch he can’t quite scratch. 

His homeroom adviser enters the room, and there is a dark gloom that follows. His adviser’s usual standoffish personality is colder than usual; her eyes are glassy, the undertone of her skin seems to be bluer, paler than normal. She is looking right at him. The black pupils of her eyes burn through his own. It’s almost as if she can sense his discomfort.

“Bang Chan…” A deep breath follows, and he finds its source to be his seatmate Kim Yugyeom. They look at one another, and Yugyeom’s eyes are equally glazed over, which makes Chan feel like his friend can see through him. A dark liquid drips from Yugyeom’s right nostril. 

“You - Your nose is bleeding…” Chan stutters and points as the blood reaches Yugyeom’s upper lip and slides right down to his chin. It drips slowly, forming a tiny puddle of blood on his seatmate’s desk. 

Yugyeom doesn’t make a move. He doesn’t blink. Chan is frozen. The puddle on the desk grows, and the light of the sun makes the blood almost gleam. There is a trance-like feeling watching blood drip ever so slowly on the surface; each drop bounces off and splatters around the table. Chan can almost taste the iron in his mouth, his lips dry and his mind fixed on confusion.

“Hey… Yugyeom… your nose…” Chan can’t quite say what he thinks. His words come out in slightly coherent parts. Chan can’t stop looking at the dark liquid. 

If not for the deafening ring of the PA system, Chan would have been completely hypnotized by the continuous flow of his classmate’s blood. 

_“Attention, students.”_

The dreary voice of the school principal echoes around the room. The spaces between words are followed by the intercom crepitating.

_“As per the request of the local police department, we must now, unfortunately, announce that our alumnus and your former schoolmate Kang Younghyun has been officially declared missing. If anybody has any information——”_

Chan doesn’t comprehend anything after that. The feeling of dread washes over him. He then turns to Yugyeom but is greeted with an empty seat and a tiny pool of blood on the desk. 


	2. we're on the road to nowhere

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I was with you, Felix,” Jeongin asserts, and there is a desperation in his voice that makes Felix flinch. “I don’t remember anything else, but I know I was with you. We were standing by a fire.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter warnings:
> 
> \- underage drinking, mentions of alcohol and drugs  
> \- mentions of vomit

**THE DAILY NINTH**

**_“20-year-old student goes missing in the town of the Ninth District” (Dated: MONDAY)_ **

Police continue their search for a Ninth District resident who was last seen two days ago by his family. 

Kang Younghyun, a 20-year-old student of the Ninth District Community College, was last seen attending a bonfire celebration held by the students of his alma mater, Silvergrass Academy. His car was found abandoned a few miles from the Willow Circle. The events that transpired to have caused the mysterious disappearance are still unknown today. 

——

**INT. THE LUNCHROOM - 12 PM, MONDAY (WEEK 1)**

Life is meant to be held with both hands; to clutch it close, to feel the possibilities and the thumping of vitality pulse between one’s fingers. When one doesn't, there’s the fear of not being able to embrace life in its fullest. 

Felix knows it and believes it. 

So when he wakes up in the morning not knowing what had happened the day before, unsure of whether or not something happened or nothing at all, he feels an incommunicable amount of concern. How could he have possibly blocked out two days from his memory? 

He doesn’t even want to _begin_ thinking about what had happened to Younghyun. There is a whole list of things he still needs to comprehend and reflect on. 

Other than the feeling of being perturbed, exists a pang of clawing guilt. Felix’s only memory is that of him being in a car with Younghyun and Chan. Nothing more, nothing less. 

Felix can convince himself that it was all a dream. An awfully realistic vision of Younghyun driving him and Chan somewhere. It was dark, and the stable motion of a moving vehicle was enough to lull him to sleep. He remembers looking at Chan as the streetlights cast a shadow over his face. Felix clearly recalls that Younghyun’s car smelled like lemon and that next to his seat was a backpack filled with some extra clothes.

There was even a subtle bass in the background coming from Younghyun’s stereo. Convincing himself this did not happen would mean that Felix is lying to himself. 

Felix sees Chan sitting alone at his usual table with nobody next to him. The guilt inside his chest begins to grow like vines, tendrils wrapping and squeezing tightly. 

“Chan... do you mind if I sit with you?” Felix’s voice is more like an audible whisper. Chan looks up at him, and Felix can see that he had cried. The senior accepts Felix’s request.

They are quiet for a while. Chan plays around with his rice but never actually takes a bite from it. Felix won’t stop drinking water in an attempt to satisfy his drying throat. 

Grief is palpable. When carried and brought onto the surface, it envelops the atmosphere and darkens it. When Felix sits down with his friend, he can almost see the light shut off. 

He isn't sure if it is appropriate to bring up his concern, but Chan always seems to read Felix’s mind. 

“I think what’s worse is that I don’t remember what happened.” Chan runs his fingers through his hair. No matter what he does, he just can’t seem to arrive at any conclusion as to what could have possibly gone wrong. 

“You - you don’t remember anything?” Felix doesn’t know whether or not to feel relief or worry that they are on the same boat. Chan shakes his head in response, and Felix can see him holding back his tears. “All I remember is being in the car with you... and Younghyun.” Felix can feel the weight lift off his shoulders a little. It was out there, he admitted it. 

Chan looks up at him, and they both make eye contact. They have a single puzzle piece and nothing else. Yet, Chan can’t deny that there is a sense of acknowledgment. “I - I don’t remember that,” the older boy shamefully admits, despite feeling like Felix is right.

“I don’t remember anything else but _that_.” Felix lowers his head down and fumbles with his fingers. Knowing that both of them have no recollection of anything happening makes Felix shiver a little. 

They stay quiet again and the usual chaos of the cafeteria has become nothing but dreary background noise. There is a chill in the air that doesn’t go away no matter how many times Felix rubs his palms together. Life is certainly going at its normal pace, his schoolmates are still laughing and talking as if nothing had happened. His grief is making time stop. 

“Do you think we know what happened to him?” Chan’s voice cracks, and both boys can almost feel the pain solidify in front of them. They are holding it with both hands. 

Felix doesn’t know.

A shuffling of feet is heard behind Felix. Chan sees the all too familiar face of his neighbor standing by the edge of their table. “Felix… I need to talk to you,” Jeongin says, his knuckles turning white from how hard he's gripping his lunch tray. 

Felix blinks and looks at Chan who crumples his brows in confusion. “Jeongin… uhm… I’ll get back to you in a second. I’m a little busy,” Felix replies with a polite smile. He cannot be bothered right now when his insides are swirling with pain and anxiety. 

But Jeongin is insistent and it shows as he walks closer towards Felix. “No, Felix.” He clenches his jaw, and Felix is taken aback. He’s never seen the younger boy look so serious and annoyed. “It’s driving me insane. I just want to know what happened two days ago.” The younger boy sits down next to him defeatedly, and Felix notices that his eyes no longer have the usual twinkle that people adore him for. 

As soon as Jeongin finishes speaking, Chan and Felix exchange worried glances with one another. Was Jeongin with them too? 

“I - I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t recall being with you that day.” 

“I was with you, Felix,” Jeongin asserts, and there is a desperation in his voice that makes Felix flinch. “I don’t remember anything else, but I know I was with you. We were standing by a fire.”

——

**EXT. THE HAN RESIDENCE - 4:45 PM**

The bell rings and Seungmin runs out of his classroom with a hammering feeling in his chest. With each step he makes, he pleads with the forces of the universe in his head that his best friend is alright. He rides his bike to Jisung’s home, his thighs and calves burning slightly from his furious pedaling and his palms moist from gripping the handle too hard. 

He pounds on the door so intensely that he's surprised his fist didn't punch through the wooden entryway of the Han residence. Jisung’s mom, clad in all grey, addresses him with a wide smile. 

“Seungmin! What brings you here today?” The small woman greets, holding a steaming bowl of what seems to be porridge in one hand. 

“Jisung wasn’t at school today, Mrs. Han. He usually tells me if he’s not coming to class, but he wasn't responding to any of my texts for some reason.” Seungmin pants by the doorway, hands resting on his knees as he catches his breath. He makes an attempt to peer behind her just in case Jisung is standing there in his living room. “Is he home?” 

Mrs. Han blinks. Her smile is unwavering. “Thank you for your concern, Seungmin. He's resting in his room right now.” She points upstairs. “He's been feeling unwell since yesterday, so I let him take the day off.”

“Oh.” Seungmin’s tense shoulders finally relax at the information. He was really hoping that Jisung’s absence from school was nothing too serious. “May I go see him for a bit?” 

“Of course, Seungmin.” Mrs. Han then passes the bowl to him, and Seungmin immediately flinches at how hot it is. He doesn't know how Mrs. Han was able to hold onto it for so long. “Do you mind bringing this up with you? Please make sure Jisung eats it, okay?”

Nodding wordlessly, Seungmin walks up the stairs to Jisung’s room, holding the bowl with his handkerchief as a barrier against the heat. The heat from the bowl produces a small billow of smoke that slightly clouds his vision. Mrs. Han must have an unusual pain tolerance. 

“Hey, dude! What’s up?” Jisung’s head poking out from underneath his pile of blankets is the first thing that greets Seungmin when he enters his friend's messy bedroom. “Don't look inside the bucket next to my bed, by the way.”

“Why didn't you tell me you were missing school today?” Seungmin grumbles instead, setting down the bowl of porridge on top of Jisung’s nightstand. He doesn't even want to _think_ about what might be in the red bucket, much less look inside it. 

“I was asleep the whole day, dude. I’ve been throwing up non stop for some reason, so I’m pretty exhausted.” Jisung takes a spoonful of the porridge before he gags. “My mom is great at a lot of things, but she cannot cook at all.”

Seungmin frowns in concern. Jisung has never been the sickly type. In their many years of friendship, Seungmin can count on one hand how many times Jisung had skipped school for being ill. From being able to drink a mixture of blended condiments in one shot to eating food months past its expiration date, Jisung himself claims that his stomach is made of steel, which is why it is such a surprise that Seungmin’s best friend is sick.

“Did you eat something bad? Is it food poisoning?” Seungmin nudges at Jisung to eat more of his porridge, but Jisung stubbornly shakes his head in disgust. “Perhaps a mild case of salmonella? And hey, you have to eat something.”

“I don’t think it’s salmonella, Seungmin.” Jisung finally sits up on his bed, unwrapping the bar of chocolate on top of his nightstand. The look on Jisung’s face is pure bliss once he finally sinks his teeth into the sweet treat. “Might be that weird drink we had at the party, though.”

There is a deafening silence before Seungmin fully processes Jisung’s statement. The throbbing pain in his head is back, and Seungmin is a hundred percent sure it’s because his brain is finally reaching its breaking point. 

“What the hell are you talking about? What drink? And what party?” Seungmin for the life of him cannot figure out if Jisung is playing some kind of sick joke on him. The latter looks appalled, almost as if Seungmin just told him that the world was going to end tomorrow, or that Jisung’s favorite band was going to stop making music. 

“The one that we went to, like, two days ago? With all the cool seniors from our school?” Jisung’s forehead creases, mimicking Seungmin’s concerned expression from earlier. He even puts down his chocolate bar, and that’s how Seungmin knows Jisung is being dead serious.

A party with their high school seniors? Seungmin’s mind travels back to the announcement the principal made this morning at homeroom. His gut churns with nervousness. Somehow, he feels as if he were responsible for the tragedy that had happened simply by being at that party, even though he doesn’t even remember being there.

“Did you hear about what happened to Kang Younghyun, one of the former students at our school? He’s been reported missing for two days, Jisung.” Seungmin breathes out the air trapped in his lungs, still shaken by the news. He collects himself for a minute and then asks, “Was he there at the party?” 

Jisung’s eyes look like they’re about to pop from their sockets. “Well, shit, that’s fucking horrible.” Seungmin nods in agreement. “But no, dude. I don’t remember seeing him at the party. Hell, I don’t even remember what I did yesterday.”

Seungmin’s frown only deepens. “I don’t either, and it’s been bothering me so much.” His mind still goes blank at the thought of yesterday’s events. With the added information about the party that apparently took place two days ago, it seems like the confusion will never end. 

“For all we know, we could’ve gotten super shitfaced that night.” Jisung seems to buy his explanation for forgetting a bunch of information, but Seungmin doesn’t. He won’t. 

“That might be the case for you, but I’m aware of my limits with alcohol and I’d never even _think_ about going that far. We both know that.” The lack of memories in Seungmin’s brain will truly be the death of him. It’s almost like the harder Seungmin tries to remember, the more his mind won’t allow him to.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Jisung racks his brain for any other information that might help them both. “I really don’t remember anything else regarding the party, aside from y’know, drinking and stuff.”

Seungmin’s disappointment is unmeasurable, but it's not like he can blame Jisung because it wouldn’t be fair for his friend. “Really? Nothing at all?” 

Jisung nods. “Maybe we did something so _embarrassing_ to the point where our brains had no choice but to wipe out our own memories.” He seems pretty convinced. Seungmin smiles a little.

The two of them sit in silence after that. Jisung, still a little too sick to function properly, and Seungmin too absorbed in his own thoughts.

Once the sun starts to set, Seungmin decides it's best if he just leaves Jisung to recover. He bids his friend goodbye and tells him to feel better soon, reaching for the doorknob and his backpack.

“Dude, wait!” Jisung’s voice stops Seungmin from opening the door. “I think I remember the guy who gave me the address to the party!”

The backpack falls to the floor. Genuine relief floods Seungmin. He might not feel so hopeless after all. “Who is it? Maybe we can ask him to tell us what happened that night!”

“I think it was Lee…” Jisung’s face scrunches up as he tries to recall the guy’s name before his mouth stretches wide into a contagious grin. “Lee Felix! The Yongbok kid from history class!”

Seungmin makes a mental note to visit a certain Australian student tomorrow. 

——

Jisung sinks on his mountain of pillows and blankets, trying to shake off his neverending feeling of nausea. He glances at the half-eaten bowl of porridge on his nightstand and chuckles slightly to himself. The one time he and his best friend were invited to a party, both of them couldn't even recall any of it. 

Although he feels like there’s no use to try and harken back to any possible events that could have happened in that party, he still makes up his own theories as to what could have happened: passing out in the middle of the street, doing drugs, getting a concussion so bad he developed temporary amnesia. Those are just some of them. Jisung can conjure up some of the most ridiculous and farfetched scenarios, yet none of them would make sense considering the fact that he woke up safe and sound in his bed two days later. 

The numerous possibilities exhaust him. What good is it to pressure his brain when he is already sick? 

Jisung thought that he had it bad at first, but poor Seungmin didn’t even realize they were at a party last Saturday. Now, he’s really desperate to figure out what the hell happened that night. 

“Moooooom!” Jisung yells out from his bed. If anything, his mother would probably know what happened since she always seemed to catch on whenever he did something wrong. 

His mother barges into his room with a smile plastered on her face. That’s odd, he thinks. Why does she seem so... delighted? 

“You didn’t ask Seungmin to stay? I made dinner.” She sits next to him, placing a hand on his arm. Jisung flinches from her awfully cold touch.

“No, he said he wanted me to rest up.” He frowns. He also wishes that Seungmin stayed longer. Jisung wants and _needs_ the company. “Also, why are your hands so cold?” 

“Must be from washing dishes.” Jisung’s mother shrugs, a smile still on her face. “You didn’t eat your porridge?” She gazes at the bowl on his table. 

“Sorry, I’m just not hungry right now.” Jisung mentally prepares himself in case his mother decides to scold him for being sick. 

“Alright, I’ll take it downstairs.” She holds his hand between hers before standing up to grab the bowl. Jisung is convinced something is wrong. On any other day, she would’ve nagged him about not taking care of himself and not eating properly. Clearly, this is not one of those days. 

“Oh, by the way,” Jisung says before she heads out of his room. “Do you remember what I did yesterday? I don’t know why I can’t remember, but maybe that’s why I’m ill.” 

She sighs, and Jisung is sure she’s going to tell him off. “Well, I got home from the market and you were already sick. You probably don’t remember since you were asleep the whole day.” 

“I was?” Jisung raises an eyebrow. That certainly does not answer any questions for him. “I didn’t tell you what happened or why I was sick?” 

“Nope.” She gives him another smile and shuts the door behind her. No explanation whatsoever, and for some reason, she is fine with it.

Jisung can slowly feel the queasiness rise up and make its way from his stomach to his throat. He wants to ruminate some more on the new details he discovered but the more he thinks about it, the more the acids in his stomach make him squirm. 

He’ll decide on his plan of action tomorrow. For now, he needs some sleep. 

——

**EXT. THE WALK HOME - 4:50 PM**

Chan makes sure to walk home with Jeongin. The younger boy was always bright, giggly, and talkative during their walks home, and seeing that Jeongin cannot even look at Chan right now is making him feel like he's failing him as a friend and as an older brother figure. 

Daylight is leaving sooner than expected. The overcast sky from this morning remains, and all Chan can think of is that the universe is mourning a loss with him. Younghyun is out there somewhere, and Chan can only hope that he is okay.

Chan feels a rough shove from behind his shoulder. He stops and turns to see who it could be, only to be greeted with a glare from a person he did not expect to see: Lee Minho. His friend, Hyunjin, is standing adjacent to him and is trying his best to look anywhere else but at Chan.

“I know you were with Younghyun last Saturday.” Minho’s ice-cold stare makes Chan and Jeongin both take a step back. It feels like _deja_ _vu_ to him for a moment. 

“I - I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Chan raises his hands defensively and he can feel Jeongin take another step back. The older boy motions Jeongin to stand behind him. 

Minho snickers and shakes his head. Hyunjin still won’t look at Chan, which is unusual since Minho and Hyunjin always seem to work in pairs. “Of course you don’t. That’s awfully convenient, isn’t it?” 

“What the hell are you trying to say?” Anger replaces the guilt in his chest. He doesn’t understand how he could have anything to do with his own best friend’s disappearance and why somebody he doesn’t care about could be pointing the blame at him. Yet, there were a lot of things Chan could not understand lately and right now he might just take Minho’s word over his own. 

“You, Younghyun, and that Felix kid came to the party at the same time,” Minho explains, and this makes Chan’s breath stop. He feels Jeongin staring at him and Chan secretly hopes that Jeongin still trusts him. “I even remember you and I having an argument.” 

“Look, I don’t remember jackshit from Saturday. I don’t even remember anything from _yesterday_.” For a moment Chan can see a hint of recognition from both Minho and Hyunjin. “Younghyun’s my best friend. He - he was like a brother to me.” When Chan says it, it comes out as a reminder to himself more than anything. Minho’s harsh expression softens a tad bit, and Hyunjin looks at Chan for the first time since the beginning of the conversation. 

“What - what about Changbin? Do you remember being with him that night?” Hyunjin interrupts the tense silence. Another person, another fact that Chan has no memory of. Every single time somebody gives him another piece of the puzzle, the picture gets bigger but nothing makes sense. Each statement is making him feel more and more like he actually had something to do with it. Younghyun is his best friend. He needs to remind himself that. 

“I’m - I’m sorry. I don’t,” Chan admits, and Minho groans. 

“He gave you free weed, Chan. You surely can’t forget that, right?” Hyunjin’s voice is gentle and encouraging, which is something Chan did not expect from somebody known for his manipulative charisma.

“He gave me free weed?” Now, the puzzle is really distorted. It’s almost ridiculous how he cannot recall some of the most bizarre and surely unforgettable moments of his life. If not for the current situation, he would laugh it off and say that it wasn't true. But there is an image that is forming in his head about that notorious Saturday party that he cannot just ignore. He can picture it and can almost recall the variety of emotions and events that could have taken place. 

“Look, we were clearly all at the same place at the same time. Why don’t we just ask other people who could have been there with us?” Jeongin finally steps forward from behind Chan. That is probably the only thing Chan has heard today that makes any ounce of sense.

“Do you remember anything else?” Chan asks, and both Minho and Hyunjin turn to each other and say no.

“Listen, I’m not associating with you and your friends. I have a feeling something happened to Younghyun that night and I don’t need any more fucking trouble.” Minho huffs and walks in the opposite direction. 

Hyunjin pauses and there is a noticeable inner conflict before he tells them, “Maybe you guys should talk to Changbin.” Then Hyunjin runs off to follow his friend.

Chan and Jeongin watch Hyunjin catch up to Minho, who turns to give them another questioning glance. Chan isn't sure if he is grateful to have been given more information to work with or to be offended by their implications. 

“Chan?” Jeongin’s voice breaks the looming silence. His voice is so innocent that Chan feels terrible for allowing the younger boy to witness whatever the previous conversation was. Chan raises an eyebrow and looks at Jeongin.

“Do you think we actually had something to do with it?” And Chan’s heart breaks at the question. Even the thought of it is too much to bear. Is it not enough that his very best friend is missing? Does it have to be his fault too?

But Chan doesn’t answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's it for chapter two! thank you for reading and we hope you guys liked it! the next chapter will be up as soon as we finish editing it.
> 
> kudos and comments are very much appreciated! we'd love to know your thoughts on this so far. 
> 
> take care and stay safe everyone, and we'll see you on the third chapter! <3


	3. hate that you know me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one knows for sure what might’ve happened, and that’s what terrifies Changbin the most; the mystery and unforeseen circumstances are what haunts him. Will Kang Younghyun be the first out of many more disappearance cases? Will he be the only one?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter warnings:
> 
> \- mentions of alcohol

**THE NIGHT PASSAGE RADIO SHOW (Recorded on MONDAY, 2:30 AM)**

_“A place where the moon always glistens, the wind always hums, and where the lights never really fade. Hello, listeners! You are now listening to the Night Passage Radio Show! I am your host Johnny and here with me today is the wonderful Tiffany! Today we will be discussing the theories surrounding the strange lights that continue to visit our town, the creature that lives by the cornfields, and the opening of a new ice cream shop by the Boulevard!”_

_“That ice cream shop is really exciting, isn’t it? I heard they’ve got around 50 different flavors!”_

_“You’re right Tiffany! But let’s not spoil the information just yet! Our listeners will just have to wait!”_

——

**INT. THE LUNCHROOM - 12 PM, TUESDAY (WEEK 1)**

The sun continues to shine, the grass grows, the wind sings, and not a single moment is spared to take another step back and feel the empty space where a person used to be; no hitches in its breath, no hiccups. As if the new dawn had completely washed away everything from the day prior. 

And Changbin doesn’t really know what to make of the tense and staged normalcy when he feels anything but _fine_. Yet he reasons out with himself, reprogramming his thoughts into believing that maybe this is how the town copes, how it survives in the face of strange occurrences and nightmarish events. Maybe people are just used to it, desensitized by the flurry of bad news.

Or, maybe they just don’t care. A follow-up thought gnaws at Changbin. 

Apathy runs through their town like a deadly disease. He knows that well enough.

Beyond his ruminations on the prickly positivity amidst the shocking news, Changbin can’t seem to figure out why he feels like all of this is partially his fault. Is this guilt thumping in his chest? Shame? Fear? A concoction of all of that? Changbin knew Younghyun but not exactly in a conventional way. Actually, the younger boy knows for a fact that they both probably would prefer to never have met. And right now, with everything going on, Changbin wishes that more than anything. Maybe he wouldn’t have a blitzkrieg of negative emotions scratching at him if they had never met. With all that aside, however, there’s just something about Younghyun, a seemingly perfect student brimming with potential, suddenly going missing that doesn't sit right with Changbin. And it’s like he’s the only one who can see that. 

Rumors are flying around that their academy’s beloved former student and unequivocally, one of their district’s most loved residents had gotten tangled with a cult dwelling in a neighboring town, while others say that Kang Younghyun ran a shady drug business and was kidnapped by an enemy drug trafficking cartel. Strange tales for an equally strange town. 

No one knows for sure what might’ve happened, and that’s what terrifies Changbin the most; the mystery and unforeseen circumstances are what haunts him. Will Kang Younghyun be the first out of many more disappearance cases? Will he be the only one?

In the corner of their school’s dingy cafeteria, Changbin sits alone as his mind wanders further. 

“Mind if we join you?” Changbin glances up to see Chan and two other students. Their lunch trays are already set on the table, however, so Changbin thinks that saying no won’t make any difference to them. 

Nodding, Changbin carefully eyes the three students as they grab chairs for themselves. He doesn't make a sound until Chan asks him another question. 

“Do you remember if I was with you at some party this past Saturday?” The question has everyone holding their breath. Changbin senses the underlying urgency in Chan’s tone like it's something the older boy desperately needs to know.

“What party?” The look on Chan’s face is saddening, and Changbin knows it's because of Kang Younghyun. For someone so carefree all the time, the senior’s red-rimmed eyes and ghastly appearance makes Changbin’s heart sink a little. He knows how much Chan relied on Younghyun and how Younghyun practically looked after the younger boy like a long lost brother; seeing the aftermath of a loss is never easy to witness. 

Unfortunately, Changbin has no recollection of ever being at a party. He's never had any reason to go to one in the first place.

“We went to one last Saturday, Changbin. Please tell me you know what I’m talking about.” Chan’s hopelessness is as clear as day. The two other boys with him have not touched their food yet, both staring at him with hopeful eyes. 

“I…” Changbin pauses to think for a moment, stopping himself from flat out telling Chan that he doesn't have any idea what the senior is talking about. In that moment of silence, Changbin’s brain clicks into place. He shuts his eyes briefly and desperately grasps the fragmented pieces of a lost memory. The moment goes just as quick as it came and he wonders if his brain merely rendered something up for the sake of his friend. He blurts it out anyway. “I think I remember being somewhere, but I don't think it was at a party.”

Finally, there is a glimmer of optimism in Chan’s eyes. The boy with the fox-like features speaks for the first time. “Do you know where?” He points at himself and the boy Changbin knows as Felix. “Were we there too?”

He turns away from the younger boy to look at Chan in the eye “I only vaguely remember seeing Chan, Minho, and the other guy he's always with.” Changbin closes his eyes again in an attempt to squeeze out more memories from his mind. It's all coming to him at once but it slips away before he can understand it. “I remember trees. Lots of trees and then a clearing. We were all running.”

Felix’s voice is deep but gentle when he asks, “Is that all?” 

Changbin nods, knowing there's not much else he can say anymore. His vision blurs slightly and his mind swallows up whatever it had just produced, making Changbin doubt if anything happened at all; his memory mirroring that of a deluded hallucination rather than reality. It’s only now that he feels the absurdity of the entire situation, but he doesn’t let it show——doesn’t let them see the barrage of emotions that have cascaded on him——in fear of vindicating a reality he can’t even quite grasp yet. 

“I guess.” Changbin shrugs, toying with the metal spoon on his plate. He starts to experience the early beginnings of a migraine. Perhaps it's his brain stopping him from exerting itself too much. “I’d happily tell you guys if I remember anything else,” Changbin pauses again, tension digging deeper in the atmosphere. “But I can't even seem to recall what happened on Sunday.” 

All three heads snap up at the same time. “ _What!?_ ” 

——

“It’s like nobody gives a shit about what happened to Younghyun, man,” Jisung says, clutching his lunch tray as he gazes at the sight before him. It’s all so achingly normal as if Younghyun going missing was just a mere memory——long gone and in the past. Jisung did not know him well but he knows that his best friend, Seungmin, did. He feels his loss and he shares it with him. 

“I don’t get it. Why are they pretending like this is normal?” Seungmin clenches his jaw and is tempted to throw his tray across the cafeteria. He wants to scream at them and make a scene——make them feel the pain and burden and confusion that he can’t seem to get rid of. 

Jisung pats his back and puts a hand on Seungmin’s shoulder. At least they’re together. “I know,” he says remorsefully, knowing fully well it does nothing to ease Seungmin’s suffering. “Hey, Felix is right there. We can try and talk to him right now. It might make us feel better.” Jisung changes the subject, and Seungmin nods in acceptance.

They walk towards the end of the cafeteria where the paint on the wall is slightly peeling. Felix is talking to people Jisung and Seungmin know of but have never properly gotten close to. 

“Do you think this is a good idea?” Seungmin pauses and stops Jisung in his tracks. They are a couple of tables away from Felix’s group. What if this is the wrong move? What if Felix tells them something they both don’t want to hear?

But Jisung, an unappeasable ball of chaos and wild energy, turns to Seungmin with a serious look on his face. “We can’t back down, Seungmin. This is _our_ reputation on the line, brother!” Jisung trudges forward approaching the table, and all Seungmin can really do is follow. 

“He thinks we have a reputation?” Seungmin whispers to himself.

As soon as they get there, they are met with the curious faces of their peers. Felix looks up at them and just gives them a tight-lipped smile which is new considering the freckled boy always seemed to greet them with a cheerful demeanor. 

Jisung doesn’t even question if they can sit at the table, but Seungmin politely asks on behalf of the both of them to which his schoolmates awkwardly allow. Jisung gives the senior a respectful wave and bow, and a toothy smile and head pat for the student who looks younger than the rest of them.

“Hiya, Changbin! Do you have a clearer copy of the new Sonic the Hedgehog movie?” Changbin’s serious stare gives Jisung the idea that now might not be the best time to discuss their underground pirated movie deals. “No? Nada? Okay.”

Moving on, Jisung finally turns to look at the only one at the table he hasn't properly addressed yet. The Australian in question. “Hey, Felix Lee… did Seungmin and I… you know… happen to do anything weird during the party?” 

There is a collective “eureka!” moment that clearly shines through the faces of Felix, Jeongin, and Chan. Another piece of the puzzle, another face they can recognize. 

“You remember the party?” Felix raises his voice a little, and a few neighboring tables flash them a look. The group huddles closer to one another as if the following information is a secret that can never escape them. 

“What do you mean? Why do you ask?” Jisung is confused. Why _wouldn’t_ Felix remember? Jisung is a hundred percent sure that he convinced Felix to tell them where the party was being held because he is positive that on a normal occasion, he probably wouldn’t have been invited. Unless, of course, Felix was just like Seungmin and had suddenly blocked out any memory they had of that night. 

“Because I don’t remember _ever_ being at a party, Jisung,” Felix points out. Jisung looks at Seungmin, who looks even more puzzled than he does.

“I don’t remember being at that party either. But we were all there apparently,” Chan chimes in, and Jeongin nods in agreement. Changbin shrugs.

“We all must’ve gotten wasted then, huh?” Jisung laughs, only to be met with cold stares. He could very well be correct and this whole issue of forgetting days and events could be chalked up to an insane amount of alcohol consumption. However, from the way they stare at him like he has grown a second head, this is obviously an explanation that nobody is satisfied with. Still, Jisung wants to be right so badly. He knows that if he was it would mean Seungmin would be able to sleep at night.

“Yeah, but I doubt that,” Chan replies, and there is a mutual affirmation within the group. 

——

There is a prominent draft of chilling air that only Hyunjin, personally, seems to feel. He can’t quite believe that nobody else is seeing this curtain of grief that seems to blanket every corner of the town.

Hyunjin can hardly lift the spoon off his plate. He gazes at the soup and rice and fried pork that he would normally devour without a doubt. However, just the thought of doing anything at all that required moving makes him feel sick. 

Minho is across him trying his best to pretend that he isn’t uncomfortable, but Hyunjin can see right through him. Hyunjin knows Minho doesn’t understand why their other friends are laughing and telling each other stories when somebody just disappeared without a trace. He doesn’t know why they’re both feeling the loss so much deeper than expected. 

Hyunjin thinks that what truly bothers him is the fact that he doesn’t know what anything of it means (whatever ‘it’ is). Whether it be the fact that his last memory is of Chan and Changbin in the woods, or why he seemed to have skipped an entire day without knowing why or how. He just wants an explanation so that he can finally put his mind to rest.

Hyunjin looks around to examine the unusually vibrant student body. There is a group of people that stand out. People that probably hold the answers to his questions. 

Subtly kicking Minho’s foot under the table, Hyunjin finally finds the courage to intrude the older boy’s lunch. “Minho, I think we should go talk to them.” Hyunjin motions towards the table at the far end of the cafeteria.

Minho makes a face that Hyunjin can’t quite decipher. On a normal day, Minho would’ve cackled at the suggestion or grimaced from disgust, but today has proven to be anything but normal. “You know they probably had something to do with it right?” 

A pause. “Do you really think that?” The younger boy sighs. He knows Minho isn’t as spiteful as people think he is. Hyunjin is aware that Minho is actually the complete opposite: he cares a little too much. But right now, with everything going on, Minho needs to be protective, and Hyunjin understands that. 

Minho doesn’t respond to the question. Instead, he swallows the remaining food in his mouth, and Hyunjin can sense that Minho is unsure of what he believes.

“Hyunjin, are you scared?” Minho can see through Hyunjin all the same. For a moment, he feels like tearing up because Minho just realized something he could not, for the life of him, admit to himself. Hyunjin is so terrified it sickens him. 

Minho gets up from his seat. He doesn’t need an answer to know what Hyunjin feels. 

They both walk towards the end of the cafeteria and it almost seems foreign. Their uneasiness is conspicuous to those around them as they have gathered quite a few questioning looks and whispers. 

Both boys stand by the edge of the table and are greeted with mostly familiar faces. Some are surprised they are there, some aren’t. 

“Since we’re all here, why not talk about it now?” Minho suggests as he sits on the empty seat next to Chan. 

Almost as if Pandora's box breaks open, the many revelations and confessions rise to the surface. Nonetheless, there are still blanks to be filled and questions to be answered. 

For a moment, the veil of misery and fear is lifted. They had first felt their fear in solitude. Now, there are eight of them, all carrying weight on their shoulders. They emphasized the core of human nature: the need to be loved, to be seen, to be accepted, to be known. And now they are seen, they are accepted, and they are known. They are all so human in their ways, yet so alien in their own world.

Someone nearby is whistling a tune that greatly bothers their discussion. At the edge of their table stands a smug, cheeky boy named Donghyuck. He taps his foot until every single one of them has their eyes on him. 

“Hey.” Donghyuck leans in. “The cops are coming by tomorrow.” 

“Okay, and what does that have to do with us?” Minho immediately questions as he raises an eyebrow. 

Donghyuck laughs, and the mockery in his voice makes all of them flinch with annoyance. “Jeez! Someone’s defensive! I’m just here to warn you guys.” 

“But why do you need to warn us?” Seungmin asks. Half of him is certainly irritated, but the other half of him is also concerned. 

“Because I know you guys were at that party last Saturday, duh!” Donghyuck smiles, and Chan is itching to shove him out of the cafeteria.

“So what? That doesn’t mean anything. Get the fuck out of here,” Changbin warns him. They can’t deal with anybody else scrambling up whatever it is they just talked about beforehand. 

“Jesus Christ. This is why nobody talks to you, asshole.” Donghyuck marches off with a sneer, and on behalf of Changbin, everybody at the table feels offended. 

Once Donghyuck is fully out of sight, they all release their breaths that they’ve been holding in. There is no doubt that they’re all nervous after hearing what Donghyuck just said to them, and there’s really no reason for the boy to lie to them either since everyone knows that Donghyuck’s father is the head of their district’s police station.

“If what he’s saying is true, then we’ve got to get our stories straight,” Chan proposes with a sigh, obviously stressed by the new information, and everyone at the table agrees. “All of us don’t remember much and none of us know why. But we have to _at_ _least_ have alibis that the cops can believe.” 

——

**INT. THE LEE RESIDENCE - 5:40 PM**

Minho barges into his room and immediately falls on the warmth of his duvet. The pulsating pain on the right side of his head weighs him down like a magnet pulling him towards the ground. He feels a little bit like passing out and even considers it, but the puzzling images in his brain hinder him from doing so. 

His feet push off his shoes and he crawls between the delicate folds of his cotton sheets. He shuts his eyes and the vision of him arguing with Chan and what seems to be Changbin flashes in his mind once more.

Vaguely recalling the distant memory, he discerns the long trunks of trees and the darkness that engulfed him and the people he was with. The only source of light was from Chan’s shitty phone which barely did anything. 

Minho groans to himself, not knowing what to do with such an incomplete and seemingly insignificant picture of what happened that Saturday night. Even with his blurry recollections, he still debates with himself whether or not these were real experiences or simply life-like dreams. 

He wants to sleep it off. The exhaustion from lugging around a pang of nameless guilt in his chest has made going through a day a hundred times more difficult than usual. 

There is a knock on his door. It opens to reveal his mother, who is way too overdressed to be at home. “Minho, dinner is almost ready,” she says in her sing-song voice. 

He mumbles a reply, and she leaves him be. Another reason to worsen his already pounding headache. 

Dinner, which is usually spent with the whole family, is not spent the same way at the Lee residence. Minho, who values his privacy and would rather eat during his own time, despises having dinner with his parents. He usually eats dinner alone or in his room, relinquishing the peace and quiet that his parents never seem to give him. Eating at the dinner table meant his father was home, and Minho has all his reasons as to why dinner with his parents is considered to be insufferable. 

After minutes of wondering whether or not he should come up with an excuse to opt out of their rare family gathering, Minho decides to face it anyway. Maybe he’ll get something out of it, he bitterly thinks to himself. 

Their dinner table is set too grandly for a meal for three people. His parents sit at their usual seats, with him across his mother. 

“Some families are unbelievable!” His father exclaims as he puts down his phone. Minho sighs to himself before taking a bite from his supper. 

“Is there a problem, honey?” his mother asks. She puts on a worried tone that she rarely ever uses on Minho.

Minho’s father, the Ninth District’s hotshot lawyer, is in charge of most of the cases that happen at the richer side of town. He deals with businesses, divorce settlements, and family issues, which makes their home a gold mine for gossip. 

“The Kang family does not want to settle. That means more work for me,” his father complains while he angrily chews on a piece of meat. There truly is something so cold and unforgiving about him that Minho cannot quite point out. “Speaking of... Minho, did you hear about that Younghyun kid? He was from your school, right?” 

Minho is shocked by the sudden attention averted his way. “Yeah, they announced it at school yesterday.” He remembers the chill that ran down his spine as the voice from the speaker echoed in his classroom. Younghyun's disappearance. It still hasn’t settled with him. 

“Well, did you know him?” His mother looks at him with her empty eyes. Minho isn’t sure if it’s a look of worry on her face or one of mere curiosity. The thought of her parading to their little neighborhood book club to feed the nosy parents with gossip makes Minho feel uneasy.

“No, not at all.” 

With a snap, a new discussion emerges and they move on from the topic of Younghyun just as quickly as it had come up. Minho wallows in his misery and guilt, separating grains of rice from one another like pieces of a puzzle. Why does he not have the ability to get over things like they do? Why does he have to haul his pain around like a sack of bricks with every move he makes?

And then he realizes that he should at least get something out of being there with his aggravating parents. 

He doesn’t even notice the conversation they are having when he interrupts them. “Can I ask you guys a question?” 

They pause and give him a look. It’s a cross between disbelief and astonishment since Minho has never been the one to talk to them voluntarily. 

“What is it?” The slight annoyance in his father’s voice doesn’t bother Minho one bit. He’ll simply get his answer and leave them be. 

“What was I doing this past Sunday? I don’t seem to remember.” 

His parents glance at one another, unsure. It’s enough to convince him that they don’t have a clue either. So much for asking. Of course they don’t know, they _are_ his parents. 

“Weren’t you at Hyunjin’s place?” His mother puts her chopsticks down, swirling her signature glass of red wine that seems to be permanently stuck to her hand. “I remember you telling me you were sleeping over for the weekend.” 

Well, that definitely sounds like news to him. Sleeping over at his best friend’s house is not a surprise, but how could he forget such a vital piece of information?

“I wasn’t home then?” He still asks to make sure. Minho doesn’t know where he’s going with this. 

“No, you weren’t. You came home at around 3 PM last Sunday and just went straight to your room.” She shrugs and returns to eating her meal. 

Minho slouches in his seat and stares at the full plate before him, appetite decreasing even more. He didn't get much out of it after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're reading this then thank you so much and we hope you liked it!!!
> 
> kudos and comments are very much appreciated! we'd really love to know your thoughts / theories :D
> 
> thank you and see you on the next chapter!!! <333

**Author's Note:**

> this was meant to be posted maybe around TWO whole months ago but we decided to just post it on october (chan + minho month and halloween!) this is both the longest thing we have ever written, and we really hope you all enjoy! 
> 
> kudos and comments are highly appreciated! we'd really love to know your thoughts. 
> 
> thank you and see you all on the next chapter! <3


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